Sex Beyond “Yes”: Pleasure and Agency for Everyone

Philosopher Quill R Kukla questions traditional notions of consent in this honest, humanistic reimagining of what it means to have pleasurable, ethical, and respectful sex.

Releasing from W. W. Norton & Co. on September 2. Preorder it now in the United States, Canada, Europe, and many other parts of the world!

You can also pre-order the audiobook at a huge discount right now!

Upcoming book launch events!

  • September 10 at ABC books in Amsterdam: Discussion With Mari Mikkola

  • September 12 at Shakespeare and Sons in Berlin: Discussion with Juliana Gleeson

  • September 24 at Politics and Prose at the Wharf in Washington, DC: Discussion with Vanessa Wills

  • September 25 at The Queer Book Store at the Center in New York: Discussion with Avgi Saketopoulou

  • October 9 at The Common Press Bookshop in London: Discussion with Dee Whitnell

  • October 12 at The Lighthouse in Edinburgh: Discussion with Mirjam Müller

  • October 23 at Pilsen Books in Chicago: Discussion with Ray Briggs

    More events yet to come! Look out for dates in San Francisco (with Rabbi Elliot Kukla), Boston, and Montreal and maybe a few more!

“An astute reassessment of what empowered sex means in an imperfect world ... [A] perceptive critique of a binary consent culture in which good sex is made to be more about avoiding harm than experiencing pleasure. Well-reasoned and complex, it’s a vital addition to an important cultural conversation." - Red Starred Review, Publisher’s Weekly

Here are some of my other academic and popular writings about sex!

“That’s What She Said: The Language of Sexual Negotiation”, Ethics 2018

“Sex Talks” , Aeon 2019

“A Nonideal Theory of Sexual Consent”, Ethics 2021

“Sexual Ethics for Virtual Cyborgs” (with Dan Steinberg), German version, Sexuologie 2025

“Consensual Sex as an Intimate Joint Activity”, Analysis 2024.

Watch and listen to me talk about sexual agency, pleasure, and consent!

“Consent to sex in a nonideal world,” conversation with Kate Greasley, 2024

“Agency, Ambivalence, and Consent,” lecture at Simon Fraser University, 2024